All Quiet on the Zombie Front

We dream, you decide.

My Keep Missoula Weird column this week declares Missoula as the unequivocally best place to survive the zombie apocalypse. Well, I tried to make that come across, at least.

Zombie Tools’ “Mack Daddy-O”

Zombie Tools is an easy springboard into all things absurd. I mean, these guys make a living off of tempering steel blades specifically designed to destroy legions of undead. Sweet and/or ridiculous, right? But then it became about location, location, location.

Which is hard to do without sounding at least a little jaded, judgmental or just plain mean (sorry, folks in the Bitterroot and Northern Idaho).

Wrapping up with funny lists of culture to retain should the apocalypse finally demonize the bulk of humanity seemed more like a cop-out than a definitive ending. It wasn’t related to Missoula, and frankly I could easily write 500 words worth of lists of cultural artifacts to preserve after the zombie hordes arrive. I should have closed with “what a great support group we have, all these wacky zombie believers living in one confined space, so seemingly prepared for utter doom.”

For the record, I don’t believe in zombies any more than they believe in me.

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